Life on the Kangi
Kangi is Japanese for hamster wheel and I’ve been on one for quite some time. My frustration is at an all time high which is putting me into a lot of danger right now – red flag warning to my fellow Extractors, keep checking on my status because for the last week now, friends have been giving me strange looks and slowly backing away from me, firmly grasping their cell phones and small children.
The biggest problem with the Kangi is that while on it, you develop the delusion that one day, soon, oh so soon, you’re going to get off. Mathematically, it seems the longer you’re on it, the sooner you should be getting off. But in fact, the opposite is true. The longer you’re on it, the more likely you are to stay put. I woke up with this realization at 6am this morning (Any of you who know FalloutGirl, knows she likes her beauty sleep), so this was quite troubling. And unbeautifying. While I try to figure out how to get off this damn thing, I thought I’d look at various other versions in case my epiphany turns out to be a premonition.
The Pink Coupe is my favorite. This sporty number has the practicality of great gas milage using hybrid technology. If you have to be on the Kangi, might well lessen your carbon foot print.
Here’s the Harley of Hamster wheels. Add a sissy bar and you and your lady can Kangi together.
Here’s a prototype recently unveiled at the car show in Detroit.
I found out there’s even a Hamster Wheel Dating service called HamsterHarmony.com
Glad to know I’m not alone on this despicable wheel.