Fallout Girl's Blog

Dionysus Panics; Let’s Drink From The Fountain of Youth While We Still Can.

Radiation Level:  High

Listening To:  The Bird and the Bee covering Sarah Smile by Hall and Oats

My Cup Quaketh while the Earth Shaketh

Dionysus, the ancient Greek god of wine, the inspirer of ritual madness and  ecstasy, is really freaking out.  That’s big.  While many mourn the devastating loss of loved ones in Chile, Dionysus and his cult of oenophiles are mourning WINE.  Ruby red, complex aromaed, olive noted, smoky toned wine.

Chile’s wine industry was hit particularly hard by the 8.8 magnitude earthquake and early estimates indicate that losses run to nearly $1 billion in spilled wine alone.

The Wine Level Was Waist High

A security guard at Bisquertt Winery’s 1,400-acre vineyard in Chile, arrived at his job at 7 a.m. last Saturday and couldn’t believe what he saw.

“The road was turned into a red torrent; the wine was streaming down the irrigation ditch,” he remembered.

Dionysus Lurking...

To me, this sounds Biblical, on par with rivers running red with blood in the New Testament’s book of Revelations.  After the nuclear bomb deployed in Colorado in 2008, I thought the portended nightmares had come to pass.  Strange how the southern New World wine growers were hit with an earthquake just as scientists are developing anti-aging drugs from the resveritrol in wine.  Nature continues to regulate the population for us every time we have the hubris to think we can cheat death.  Dionysus knows this and is concerned.  He doesn’t like humans taking over his expertise.

Dionysus Raging Against Man

Leading  resveratrol researcher, Dr. Christoph Westphal, says the science behind wine as the “fountain of youth” is simple.  “Skinny animals of all kinds, including human beings, live substantially longer than average. The thinner we are, the less food we take in, the more we turn on the sirtuin survival pathways [sirtuins are proteins in organisms that influence aging]. This phenomenon allows starved animals to overcome a lack of food to live longer and still reproduce. Red wine has a molecule that mimics calorie restriction and activates the sirtuin genes.” He remarked, excitedly.  The drug that Dr. Westphal is developing is said to be 1,000 times more potent than the molecule in red wine.

For this Dionysus Cult follower, the rivers of red wine are a "dream come true".

Until this drug is available at our local Target pharmacy, let’s honor and cherish the red wine we still have.  I think a collective toast to Dionysus is in order.  Tonight at midnight, let’s raise a glass to him and indulge in some centuries old ritual madness and ecstasy.  Who’s in?

Cheers To You!

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  1. * Jeremy says:

    If consuming more food (and I assume calories) makes us age faster, and red wine makes us age slower, then;
    At what point will the calorie consumption from drinking red wine overtake the benefit of the anti-aging molecule? Or maybe that will never happen, and we should all drink red wine in excess forever, and become immortal winos!

    I think a graph of some sort is in order.

    | Reply Posted 9 years, 4 months ago
    • You’ve just discovered the basic tenet of Vampyrism. Cool! Where’s my glass…

      | Reply Posted 9 years, 4 months ago
  2. * taicarmen says:

    Wow! How did I miss this in the news? VERY Dionysian. Cheers back! Excellent post!!

    | Reply Posted 8 years, 3 months ago

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