Climbing Out of the Fallout Shelter
Radiation Level: 1–2Sv
Listening to: My Name is Trouble by Keren Ann
I’ve emerged from my fallout shelter and hope to stay above ground for a long time. Have to admit – it got lonely down there. I really missed the Purr-O-Matic 3000 (it’s been just over a year since he went to kitty-robot heaven) But I think I may have found an adorable pet to take his place. While I was ducking radiation, I found these Petite Lap Giraffes on the internet. Aren’t they cute?
I can’t wait to get one! Apparently, the breeders have gone to great extent to ensure they’re docile and affectionate, unlike their wild african cousins . They aren’t cheap ($7,500), so I’m saving my money. They arrive via UPS and the shipping is free. For food, they drink distilled water and eat bonsai tree leaves. They grow to be only 76 centimeters tall. Me want, me want, me want!
I’m going to spend tonight thinking of a name. And thinking how to make seven grand. Maybe the Russian breeders take Discover Card?